Why My Bathroom Smells Like Marijuana

Quote for today: The art of living is more like wrestling than dancing. Marcus Aurelius

There was a funky smell coming from my bathroom this morning. I looked high and low and couldn't for the life of me figure it out until now. First, let me get this completely straight. I do not smoke marijuana nor do I do any other drug for that matter but I am a teacher and so my nose is attuned to these things. Also, who hasn't been to those college parties where the fumes from the smoke were so thick that you couldn't see two inches in front of your face. It's a reality and I know that I have to face facts that my own daughter is probably going to be at those parties too. And, let's be honest here, there was a short moment, back in my prime, when I did dabble with the MJ here and there until I realized that for the most part it just made for a wacky but very sleepy party that crashed nearly immediately afterward, which was of no use to a night owl like myself at the time. Marijuana, the gateway to a life of crime and diabolicalism, if you can get up off of the couch. Anyway, back to my dilemma. As I explained, I do not smoke pot, I am currently nearly two years cigarette free and I do not dabble in narcotics of any kind. So it is quite understandable why, upon entering my bathroom this morning, I would be surprised and even alarmed to be confronted with the slick, pungent odour of the aforementioned green demon. I was stumped. I thought that perhaps something was leaking or that something had been spilled. I set about and cleaned and scrubbed until the bathroom was a radiant display of sparkly goodness. Surely there were no more nasty uglies in there, I was certain that nothing could possibly outlast my vigorous effort. I took a big sniff but sure enough, underneath all of the fumes from the numerous cleaning agents, that ranky, skunky smell pervailed. I was at a loss. 'Think think think', I told myself as I racked my brain for clues that might let me in on what could possibly be going on. What had I done differently in the last 24 hours, what if I had a leak that I would have to pay to repair. Suddenly, it hit me. The bathmat!!! We had just purchased it yesterday at the Walmart. I checked the mat. Yes, that was it alright. I now have a bathmat that makes my bathroom smell like a grow op. The absurdities of my life never fail to amaze me.